What's Normal
- •Fears often grow as imagination grows (especially preschool and early school age).
- •A child can be brave all day and still feel scared at night—nighttime is quiet and dark.
- •Nightmares are common and can spike after stress or scary media.
- •Reassurance works best when it’s calm, brief, and repeatable.
Routine Steps
- 1Connect
Get close, breathe, and say one calm sentence that names bedtime.
- 2Set the plan
Give one simple boundary and one choice you can repeat.
- 3Close the loop
Use a calming cue and the same ending phrase each night.
What To Avoid
- •Long negotiations or adding new rewards mid‑routine.
- •Big reactions (anger, long lectures) that add energy.
- •Changing the plan repeatedly once lights are low.
What Helps Tonight
- •Validate without confirming: “That feels real to you. You’re safe.”
- •Do a quick ‘room check’ once, then stop repeating it.
- •Create a ‘brave script’ to repeat: “Monsters are pretend. My room is safe.”
- •Use a comfort item and a calming bedtime story with gentle imagery.
- •Keep the routine predictable and short; too many choices can feed worry.
- •In the daytime, play about bravery (draw a ‘brave shield’, make a plan).
When To Get Help
- •If sleep issues happen most nights for weeks and your family is exhausted.
- •If there are safety concerns (leaving the house, dangerous climbing, choking risks).
- •If you suspect pain, breathing problems, or you’re worried about health—check with a pediatrician.